The Passing of a Friend

Sean Lucey, my co-worker who was diagnosed with ALS last year, passed away yesterday morning. Sean was an incredibly nice, amazing man, and he will be very missed. I had the pleasure of seeing Sean a few months ago and am now sad to know that I will never see him again. My heart and good thoughts go out to his wife, children, and family that he has left behind. He was a good person who was taken from this world far to soon, but I take comfort in knowing that he is in a better place now, free from any pain.

I know we all say it - but life is too short. Be thankful for what you have, every single day.

Here is the link to Sean's obituary:

http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/bostonglobe/obituary.aspx?n=sean-e-lucey&pid=154524061&fhid=4683&eid=sp_shareobit

xoxo

Belly Update

I called the doctor today to find out about the discomfort in my lower abdomen. Thankfully it’s nothing major. I really like my doctor’s office a lot. I leave a message on the nurse line and someone calls me back within an hour or two, and sometimes it’s within a few minutes. I talked to a nurse for a good 5 minutes and she explained over the next 10 weeks my uterus will expand rapidly, and there are muscles on either side of my uterus that are stretching quickly. So, she suggested alternating heat and ice and taking Tylenol, and also getting a belly band if I felt comfortable with it because that can help support my “rapidly” growing belly. I feel dumb calling, but the nurse made it clear to call at ANY time, that no question is dumb, and that they are there to help. That is exactly what I needed to hear and I feel very well treated there.

Mexico is next week and I have to say I’m pretty nervous about flying. I know I will be fine – I typically don’t mind flying at all, I think I’m just overly nervous with being pregnant and worrying something could go wrong. I see the doctor for my monthly check up next Monday so I’m glad that I’ll have that last visit before I go.

This coming weekend is the annual Tutela family gathering at our house (Nick’s mom side of the family). I think this year it will be about 30-35 people. I’m looking forward to it. Even though it is A LOT of work, I love that everyone comes and it’s great that we can all be together. Plus, Nick’s cousin Bryan and his wife Courtney just had their baby Friday and this will be his first official Tutela Party. I’m looking forward to meeting him (Liam) and will be sure to snap plenty of pics!


xoxo

Peace and Quiet

The house is so peaceful and quiet right now - Dexter is snoring softly next to me and Nick is upstairs reading sports articles. I really try to savor these moments, because pretty soon there will be quiet no more!

Yesterday I wasn't feeling so great. I had what I could only describe as "cramping" in my lower abdomen. When I was around 16 I had ovarian cysts and that is what this discomfort felt like. It wasn't overly painful, just very uncomfortable. When I sat down, it got worse. I don't know if it could be the pressure of the baby (he only weighs a little over a half a pound), or something else. I do feel better today though, so I'm just going to be mindful of it and call the doc if it doesn't get better. I had my friend Karleigh's baby shower and the girls did an amazing job! They went with a bumble bee theme (Karleigh doesn't know what she's having) and everything was delicious and so cute - Paula even wore yellow and black. I got to see Jenna & Jeff's house for the first time and it is SO nice! They live in Windham and the set up is great and the house is full of light - I'm very happy for them.

Saturday was also trick or treating in Dracut as it was rescheduled due to the power outage. Nick decided to invite half of Dracut over - I really wasn't up for having people over but I wasn't going to have Nick rescind the invitation. Originally Brooke was coming over and maybe John too, and that was it. We ended up with a small group, all of which left by about 10. Man we are getting old :) But I had a nice time, even though I wasn't feeling well I think having people here and me being distracted really helped. Also - we had about 25 bags of candy and we RAN OUT! HALF WAY THROUGH! I couldn't believe it. Guess we'll have to get double next year!

Hope everyone had a great weekend!

xoxo

21 Week Baby Bump

Hey everyone - Sorry for the delay! I'll blame Comcast for taking awhile to give us our cable & internet back ;) (for those that don't know, Nick works in sales for Comcast, heehee)

This is my favorite pregnancy outfit so far. I have always been proud of my curves, and now with the extra curve on my front half (and the back half getting curvier) I really like the way I look. I usually wear this outfit during the week, and on the weekend if I'm not feeling too lazy.

As a kid I used to make an "ugly" face where I'd stick out my bottom teeth (which are crooked), and it always made people laugh. I'm making that face in this picture.

Here's a pic of the big brother so he doesn't feel left out. He likes to turn away a second before I take the picture, I think the flash might bother his (gigantic) eyes.

Older

This is an email forward that's been circulating for years. I have it on my desk at work and it always makes me smile. People don't realize how truly lucky they are. And no, I do not think I am "old", I just really like the message in this. I have a plaque on the wall in our bedroom that says "Do Not Regret Growing Old, Many are Denied the Privilege"

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I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to ”oldies” music, and if, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from others. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But then again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or when someone's beloved pet is hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face.

So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore... I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day(if I feel like it).
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Just some pics...

My Halloween Cupcakes -they came out so cute!

Dexter in the snow - I didn't necessarily want a picture of him peeing, I just think it's funny that he pees about a foot from the house (on the deck) and runs back inside instantly because he hates the cold.

A tree in our backyard weighed down by the snow.

Dexter and my mom, when he finally took a break from driving her crazy.

Baby's Kickin!

When I used to eat a really big meal and my stomach was all full up, I would always rub my belly and say “baby’s kicking!” For the first time yesterday I felt the actual baby kicking! I wasn’t sure at first, but I just feel little “pings” of movement from the inside – that’s really the only way I can explain it. It’s interesting..I am definitely paying much more attention. It is mostly in my lower lower abdomen, like right above my you know what (sorry if that’s TMI for some!) I was on the phone with Nick and I said “oh my god that’s so weird!” because I felt a kick down south. He can’t wait to be able to feel it from the outside and rubs my stomach all the time hoping to feel something. The baby is a little over a half a pound so he is still pretty small and the “kicks” are light, almost like butterflies in my stomach.

I have been working on Christmas shopping. I usually start around September in the hopes to be done before December. This works out well for me because I’ll spend a little bit each pay check and I do not go too crazy and get overwhelmed. I do need some help though – I’m looking for cute grandparent to be ideas, and have had no luck. The frames I find are cheesy, and nothing seems to be “just right”. I know a handful of moms now so I’m hoping you ladies can help me out.

xoxo